One of the most exciting things I’ve discovered as a result of lecturing and leading workshops all over the world is that we’re always teaching others what we need to learn. Sometimes we tell other people what they need to do as a way of reminding ourselves of what we need to do. For example, I often hear myself reminding people in my audiences about the importance of taking time off to care for themselves – advice I could definitely benefit from taking!

This week, pay close attention to the advice you’re giving others. Look for the ways in which this advice could serve you.

Activity:

For the next week, observe the advice you give to other people. What do you suggest that those around you do to better their lives? Do you encourage them to speak out? To set stronger boundaries? To be less concerned with what others think? This week, as you give advice to others, notice if you could benefit from a little dose of your own medicine, and take whatever steps or actions you’ve recommended for them.

If you don’t normally give advice to others, think about someone you’d like to give advice to. What would you say? Now see if this advice applies to you.

50 points for each time you take your own advice.

(c) Debbie Ford

Note: For this week and next I’ll be typing out the card here so that you can participate if your kit hasn’t come yet. After that I’ll be directing you to the card for the week without typing it out, so you’ll need to look up the details for each card on your own. Make sure that you get the kit here.)

“People pleasing is one of the great epidemics of our times. I know so many people who can’t seem to find the time or energy to nurture their own dreams or bring their goals to fruition. Could it be that people-pleasing is the silent culprit behind their exhaustion and overcomitted schedules?

Many of us learned early on that pleasing others is a good way to receive validation or affection. And now it’s become a habit that we perpetuate even though it doesn’t serve our visions. This week, take your focus off of pleasing others, and instead look for ways to please yourself!”

Self-Love Assginment:

Reflect on one are of your life where you feel resentful, powerless, or resigned. Allow yourself to see how many of your actions in this part of your life are driven by your need to please others. What lengths do you go to in an attempt to get others to like you? Do you pretend to be the “nice” guy or girl? Do you conceal some of your brilliance or hide some of your power so that you won’t indimidate others?

Next, ask yourself if your quest to be liked and please others has actually paid off. Is it bringing you what you want?

Allow yourself to see what would be available to you if your first commitment was to please yourself. How would that affect your sense of worthiness, joy, and self-love?

Finally, identify 3 actions you could take this week that would be pleasing to you…and take them.

Give yourself 50 points for every action you take (or don’t take) that pleases you.

(c) Debbie Ford – Best Year of Your Life Kit

Discuss your experiences in the comments section.