Hi Everyone -

I’m just getting the hang of this “blog” concept.

I feel this week’s card was meant for me. So often, I settle for things that are “good enough” because I make excuses about “not having enough time” or “not feeling like it.” This week I will use this card to jumpstart my new “YODA” program. Remember his words? ”
“DO or DO NOT. THERE IS NO TRY.” Yoda.

Today, I will vacuum the house. I will cook a nourishing meal. I will write in my journal.

OK, I am really going to embrace this week’s card. And I started this morning by getting my body out of bed, giving it a couple ibuprofen for the killer headache I had, and telling myself that was no excuse not to do what I keep saying I am going to do – and EXERCISE.

So, I hit the floor for my yoga practice and then put on my running shoes (the old ones) and grabbed some music and headed out the door for a easy mile jog. It didn’t feel so easy since I haven’t done it in a long time, but I got through it and I feel empowered to start my day. So 50 points there and this week is looking better already!

I can’t wait to hear what everyone else has been excusing and isn’t this week. You all inspire me so please share!

I’m good at this one.
1. I’m stressed.
2. I’m tired.
3. My family doesn’t want to help me.
4. I’m busy.
5. My job is very demanding.
etc………
Tonight I will clean my kitchen. NO EXCUSES!!!

I’m going to come back and share some of my excuses and reread what you guys wrote…

But for now, I want to report that yesterday I didn’t listen to the excuse about why I could make a green smoothie (because we didn’t have soy milk) so I just put my shoes on and went to the store and got some!

How easy was that? 50 points.

And this morning, I was going to go outside and walk/jog with my friend and it’s drizzling. But I’m not going to let that be an excuse not to workout. I’m going to have her over here to do a workout video on the DVD player.

I’ll give myself points for that after I actually do it. She should be here in about 10 minutes. :-)

Well.. I wanted to report that I didn’t listen to my excuses this evening, and therefore I got my sneakers (the reward for my first 1000 points).

To do that I had to ignore the following excuses:
I’m too late getting out of work and I don’t know what time the store closes.

The traffic will be terrible.

Joe should be home soon and I need to get there to start dinner.

But in the end I went to the running store, got to the door as they were locking it – and they let me in and I bought the sneakers. So, let’s call this another 50 points for ignorning all those excuses.

And, after I got my shoes and got to Joe’s house I found out he wasn’t there. I wanted to run in my new shoes, but I kept hearing me say inside, “You don’t have time!” and “You ran this morning, you shouldn’t do it twice in a day … you might hurt yourself.”

So, because of this card…. I ran. Ahhhh 50 more points.

So, that’s 150 points today…. and I called and made my appointment for my massage for Friday at 5:30.

I’m lovin’ this self love stuff! Thanks Mona!

P.S. – Mona… I love it that you made alterate plans to exercise in the drizzle. This morning when I was jogging I thought about that exact situation and reminded myself that “I don’t melt”!!!! So you go girl!

Today one of my dogs died. That is a pretty reasonable excuse, but I gave myself an hour or two to feel the pain and then cleaned the house up anyway, and got on the computer to do some work. Nothing is going to bring her back. So I’ll be gentle with myself but keep on with life.

This morning I got up and instead of making any excuses about it feeling funny or not having enough time to work, I put in my Crest White Strips after brushing my teeth. I keep meaning to have whiter teeth and these work for me, but I often don’t make the small effort to put them in. So, 50 points there.

And I didn’t pay attention to thinking I was running late this morning and didn’t have time and I packed my little gym bag with running clothes and my new sneakers so I could go to the park after work and run on the nice path there. So 50 points there.

I think that brings me to 700 points toward my upcoming massage. Which is a good thing since it is booked for Friday afternoon already!!!

I could use some help in figuring out what’s an excuse and what’s a good reason.

If I woke up with a bad headache the way Christi did, I might well decide that taking ibuprofen and going back to bed for a while was loving my body, instead of clinging inflexibly to a plan to work out, do housework or whatever.

To me an “excuse,” used in a slightly derogatory way, means something like “I really don’t want to do it, but that’s not a good enough ‘reason,’ so instead I’ll claim to be too tired, too sore from working out yesterday, too rushed or some such.”

Used like that, an ‘excuse’ is a shady way of covering up the fact that I don’t want to and I’m pleasing myself by not doing it. It’s not expressing my real motive to myself and possibly others.

Is that what we’re talking about here — the self-dishonesty?

I’m not picking nits here, folks. I’m really not clear about excuses.

I’d be interested in hearing other people’s comments on this.

I know what you mean, Nancy.

Tonight I was thinking this:

I want to go for a walk around the block.

But my stomach hurts, so I’m not going to. (That was my excuse for not walking.)

But at the same time…

Why wouldn’t I just take care of my body/belly and stay in?

If I say: I really should walk…then that would be an excuse for why I’m not taking care of my body.

So when I have body excuses come up: like my stomach hurts, or something else hurts, or I’m super tired, then I’m noticing that.

But I’m also looking at: What excuse am I coming up with that is tempting me to avoid taking care of my body?

We can focus in on one area where we tend to make a lot of excuses for NOT doing something.

So if I tend to make excuses for why NOT to exercise, then maybe it’s importnat that I show myself that I can walk for 10 minutes even if my stomach hurts.

If I tend to make excuses for why I can’t take care of my body…like I have to do other things…Or I should be doing my work, etc. Then maybe it’s important that I NOT go for the walk, and that I stay home and nurture my sore belly.

Is that making a bit more sense?

Where is the area where you tend to make the most excuses and focus in on seeing who you’d be without your excuses in that one main area.

One that I’m paying attention to is BEDTIME!

I have all sorts of excuses why NOT to go to bed when I’m tired.

Usually I wind up staying up til midnight or 1. The other night it was 3!

So last night I had all the excuses coming up for why I should stay up…and instead I went to bed at 10:30 and listened to a sleepy meditation thing on my iPod 2x and then fell asleep and slept through the whole night.

So it was great. 50 points for that one!

This week with the excuses has been way more challenging than I thought it would be. Apparently I’m very attached to some of my excuses.

Wow this week is flying by….. I’ve been getting a lot done since I’m not listening to my excuses!

Like… yesterday I paid the month end bills at one of my jobs because I know that today and tomorrow I’ll be busy with a special project. At first I thought I should wait and just do it late on Friday and then I heard myself and “got” that that was me just putting things off. So, I knocked that out. 50 points.

I have been running a mile both morning and night since I got my new sneakers and almost without fail this has required ignoring some kind of excuse… I don’t have time… but I won’t be able to shower right away…. it looks like it’s going to rain any minute…. I should stay in bed and sleep, I’m tired etc etc etc. So I think another 100 points for that.

Yesterday at one of the jobs I went ahead and started working on downloading the new Quickbooks to the server because my responsibilities are being expanded. I almost put it off because I only had another 45 min there before it was time for me to leave and you know these technology issues can burn through time…. but I went ahead and just got it done. I’ll test it today, hopefully it worked. So 50 points for that.

And I stopped at the grocery store and stocked up on their last day of Buy 1 Get 1 Free on some Green Giant steamers and Healthy Choice frozen meals. The excuses I had to override included 1) My freezer is full I don’t have anywhere to put them. (That’s why God made a freezer at work silly). 2) I don’t have time and need to get to job #2. (That’s why there is a grocery store ON THE WAY) and 3) You shouldn’t be spending the money. (Duh… 2 for 1 on things you eat anyway… you’re not spending you’re saving!!) So more 50 points there.

I’m losing count, but I think that brings me to 800 at the moment and hopefully between getting my sneakers the other day, getting my massage on Friday and getting my hair cut and highlighted on Saturday I will be all evened out and ready to jump into next week!!

Oops…. part of the blog didn’t come up before I posted my last post…. Sorry I didn’t comment and gee I think I goofed up my point count too.

Anyway….
Nancy… I wanted to respond to you about how I knew the morning headache was an “excuse” for me.

It has to do with FEELINGS… not thoughts.

I got up and took care of my body with the ibuprofen, heating pad and shiatsu machine. That felt like taking care of my body. And, when it started feeling better the thought occurred to me that I could still run a little. I paused and just felt in my body. Heading toward my bed for another 30 min felt like “ahhhh, ohhhhh, yeah….” BUT, it also felt like, “You’re wimping out”. Heading toward the door felt like “Good Girl! Way to GO!”

So, I know I have an excuse when following it leaves me knowing I cheated myself a little and I wasn’t living up to my potential.

It really doesn’t have anything to do with holding to a plan (cause we all know how those change!!!), it has to do with the difference between feeling, inside, that I grabbed life and lived it – or that I backed away and postponed it – or let it pass me by.

One feeling is EMpowering and the other is DISempowering.

Maybe that helped??

Wow! I’ve just been reading through all the posts from all of you! Thank you so much for sharing from your hearts.

My one post was there from way back when…
Haven’t posted about any of the weeks yet…
Was away for 10 days, but have been back for over a week…Just trying to get back in the swing of things.
I’ve been feeling out of sync with the world..
One thing that has been going really great for me this year is the care of my body.
I have only missed one day all year other than the days out of the country..of going to the gym…
Do yoga, aqua aerobics, Zumba, Salsa, elliptical, weight machines, and pilates. I’ve been eating healthy foods. Am now being more aware of portions.
I am having massages every other week.
So…I haven’t figured out the points yet.
I did take two cards with me to Costa Rica and was aware of the assignments…just haven’t done the score keeping. That is pretty typical of me…not taking care of the details.
I’ve been giving myself my own advice..to be patient with myself, acknowledge what I’ve done, rejoice in my gifts and talents… I’m having trouble listening to my advice.
Oh…and in the body care dept…something a little less positive…I managed to get no mosquito bites in Costa Rica, but was not careful enough about the sun and got sun poisoning on my one inner ankle and shin/calf. Never had that before and think it’s pretty ironic that I live in Phoenix and was stupid about sun when away. We were on a boat heading toward the Nicaraguan border…stretched out my legs to get rid of my sock marks… noticed the burn later and then itching starting…red marks and then yucky hives/welts… was miserable with that after getting home. Kept me up at night…finally settled down on Tuesday and is just healing now.

Have been enjoying our fabulous weather…getting outside to appreciate it instead of just staying at my computer ALL the time…. way too much though. I’m asking myself what I am doing with my life..
Enough rambling for now…. Will get out the cards and make sense of the points.

I looked at an ad for a camera at Costco…ad expires tomorrow night though and I don’t know if it is the camera I want….and it would be a good bit of an investment. Will wait until I do my tabulating of points for myself and will start doing my camera research.

I’m inspired to post more often…

s:)

@TRISHA – Awww – how are you doing now? You comment didn’t show up on the blog right away and I’m sorry I didn’t see it sooner. I know how much you love your dogs and how much a part of your family they are.

When it comes to our excuses, it doesn’t always have to be the stuff that takes us away from doing the things we think we *should* be doing. It might also be what excuse do we come up with for why we can’t spend more time grieving – if that’s something that you tend to not let yourself do for very long. So I like the way you’re talking about being gentle with yourself while you keep on with life.

Let us know how you’re doing, k?

@SUZANNE – Ouch! Sun poisoning. I hope it’s clearing up for you. But WELCOME HOME!

Can you say more about feeling out of sync with the world?

I know that keeping track of the details can be hard sometimes. Do you have a little notebook or calendar that you could write points in?

Sometimes I forget to give myself points too and then a I remember and begin again. It’s all good.

Mona, in answer to your question….being out of sync with the world….
Brings up a lot of sadness for me even as I was writing that sentence.
I feel as though I’ve isolated myself from being with live people…as opposed to virtual connections.
With coming and going over the last few years, I have neglected connections with friends/acquaintances.
I find myself choosing to stay home rather than going to social events. Today I was going to go to church and my allergies are going crazy with sneezing and runny nose so decided I’d rather not go and be uncomfortable trying to control that during the service. When I go, I feel great with the energy of the people, music, and message.
I have not had any man social life for over 2 years. I closed the door on that when I had another disappointing relationship…was rejected for something I can do nothing about. I am doing the Calling in the One program right now and am finding myself resistant to doing the exercises. Lots of stuff coming up for me that is difficult to be with. This work can be beneficial for all aspects of my life.

I’m starting to feel as though I have a little more direction in my business after feeling lost as to how to focus on what seems most important to me and let go of what I’ve been encouraged to do to be “successful” in my business. My new niche is working with business women who are finding it very difficult to keep up with their business due to family challenges…such as aging parents, needs of grandchildren and children or their own or partner’s health. I’m concerned that there won’t be a positive response to this subject and then I’ll be discouraged in going forth with it.
I feel as though “everyone” is flying by me in the hike/race….I see so many people doing great things and receiving lots of respect…and $…
I keep waivering between letting my business go forever or continuing to try to tailor it to fit me and to make me joyful… I was able to take advantage of an opportunity for early retirement from teaching about 5 years ago and am able to meet my basic financial needs with that $. I am able to live very frugally so that I can still make the trips to family …and even an occasional trip like the one to Costa Rica. Massages are my luxury. Don’t buy clothes…don’t go out for meals…purchase food wisely…keep my monthly expenses down. So I could theoretically let the business go….but that would limit me from my vision of having my own little place in the cities where my children live so I could comfortably spend time with them. I’d like to do a lot more travel also and do even more for my self care.

The other aspect of my business is the sense of satisfaction that I am making a difference. I don’t feel as though that has really happened in all my years of coaching…7 years total including when I was still teaching. I hate to let go of my business and feel as though I’ve failed.

I also am feeling as though I’m not doing a good job of being orderly with my papers and stuff in my house…too much stored everywhere…including a lot from my mom’s house that I haven’t designated for giveaway after archiving some things.

I do well with my financial affairs (other than keeping track of business expenses effectively. Had an assistant for awhile who set up my QuickBooks and then she wasn’t able to work for me. She may be available again and am hopeful to have her work on my expenses/taxes again.
I do well with eating really wonderfully healthy foods. I am doing an excellent job of working out….at the gym everyday this year other than my 10 days away doing a variety of classes as well as weight training and elliptical.
I’m feeling a bit out of the loop because of my age…thought I would be a joyful, proud 60’s woman and was surprised that I have had such a difficult time accepting that and not letting it make a difference in so many aspects of my life… I’m now 61..hope to find peace around my aging. I’ve also looked very young for my age and have felt attractive and it’s difficult to notice that I am no longer the recipient of attention for that.
Sigh….I’ve gone on and on and it’s been good for me to do so….to notice where I’m doing well…
And I know that what I’m judging myself so harshly for is not really all that difficult although I’ve made it a major thing for most of my life.

So, excuses? I have a few…worry and sadness about my mom on hospice/ Alzheimer’s… Worry about my daughter and grandson (3) who are dealing with major challenges because of his disabilities…

I am developing a phone gathering for adult children of Alzheimer’s patients…a place to be supported in taking care of themselves and finding support from others in a similar situation.
I was at an all-day workshop last weekend for those who have someone with Alzheimer’s. Talked to one of the presenters about my idea and she is interested in letting a number of agencies know about it. I told her I’d put together a web page with the details, but haven’t done that yet…need to create it today so I can share it with her before she even forgets who I am!

I’ve contributed a bonus offer for Ellen Britt’s new teleseminar series: Caution: Family Challenges Can Be Hazardous To The Health Of Your Business. It will be a three part teleseries….will get me to put some structure to my program..and it will be a product afterward. I agonized over creating a title and description of the course… feel pretty good about what I came up with, but it’s still doesn’t feel quite on target for my new program.
Appropriate that this week’s card is surrender. I’ll make it an intention to play full out this week…It’s been time for me to surrender for a long time. I’ve been feeling that message very strongly particularly the last few months and I’ve been holding on for dear life…

I’ll be interested in hearing how this week goes for everyone…and please hold a space for my notes…

Love to all of you…Suzanne

Trisha, I am so sorry that you have lost your dog…
Difficult to be without that loving being.
I grieve for your loss..